I love the Walmart deli. Not so much for the food as the atmosphere. Their food is OK. Their fried chicken is the best value around but they never have any ready and that’s where the fun begins.
I go to the deli at about 5:30 PM. I know it’s an odd time to frequent a place selling food but I am a rebel. I proudly and loudly order 2 eight piece boxes of fried chicken. They, just as loud, inform me that I can pick up two boxes from the bottom shelf. I tell them quietly, I can read the time written on the box and I don’t like chicken that was cooked four hours ago. They frown at me and say, “It will be 45 minutes before they have any ready”. Bingo! We have a winner!
I not only get fresh fried chicken but I get to watch the fun at the Walmart deli.
I get to watch the lady order all the macaroni and cheese they have and then complain because it costs so much. I get to watch person after person read the time on the fried chicken, shake their head and wander to the frozen food section. I have the privilege of seeing the guy order two of every wing flavor. Then ask if the hot wings are hot?
It’s the best show in our small town.
Now to the best part. Not a single customer I see while waiting is thinner than I am. My once proud sprinters body is now the shape of a shot putters. So this is no small feat. Also not a single person shows any evidence of being more worldly than I.
For 45 minutes on a clear and crisp Autumn day I get to feel thin and sophisticated!
It may be a small pleasure in life but I enjoy it.
So next time you are a little down. Next time you are thinking you look a little fat in those jeans. Next time you get stumped by a few questions on Jeopardy. Don’t get down on yourself!
Pay a visit to the Walmart deli.
It will make you feel better I promise.